This morning afternoon was confusing as all hell for me, and I blame it all on last night. I woke up at 2:30pm thinking it could only be about 9am because naturally since I had a doctors appointment I’d wake up at a reasonable hour after a night of ungodly drinking, right? Wrong! When I saw the time I convinced that I had changed my clocks forward by 6 hours………. Why the fuck would I do that to myself? I had to open my laptop so that I finally realised & accepted that drunk self was not playing tricks on sober self, but rather, I was retarded and had simply slept in…

I blame it all on the Hennessy I was drinking, which I also learned does not go with PBR at all, or jager… or even red stripe… Then drunk self made it home, & apparently took off my clothes and made pizza (most likely in that order). After that I removed my laptop from the dock and took it in my room so I could apparently purchase a round trip ticket to Baltimore for the following morning, & watch The Wire – to prepare myself, naturally. So today, sober self ended up having a talk with drunk self and we’ve collectively decided to take a night off, hence the blogging coherently in the wee hours of the morning on a Saturday night. Sobriety: a novel concept.

And don’t get me wrong, I don’t have a strong recollection of ANY of the happenings of last night. I deduced the majority of last night by piecing together evidence throughout the house; pizza wrapper on the floor, clothes everywhere, laptop relocation, and some vague recollection of the words “Baltimore” & “airplane” being in the same thought = win/fail? I can’t decide. But, it’s not like I was drunk on the floor of some random bathroom in some random condo a city away from mine puking all over myself with my phone stuck to my face. But there’s always tomorrow!

Oh! And on the best note ever, we had the living room after party while listening to Das EFX and miggity made up our own viggity versions of the siggity wiggity song because bibbity boppity boo shabadoo doo thats how we do!